So we have a crude grasp of emptiness. We think ah ha all things are just phenomena, of temporary status, they have been caused, they will exist and then they will decay into non existence again. There is no permanent substance there, nothing passing through. If you wait time will erase them completely and transform them into completely different things. There is no fundmental essence behind the phenomena. There is no absolute ground to the universe.
Great I can do whatever I want.
No.
Sometimes we make the right choice. We know that. No complicated thinking, or analysis, we know it was the right choice.
Sometime we make the wrong choice. We know that. No complicated thinking, or analysis, we know it was the wrong choice.
How can this be if all things are empty?
The point is both the right choice and the wrong choice are empty. It does not stop them being right and wrong. The rightness is empty and the wrongness is empty.
But we protest, are they not the same then? Can I not ignore that I did the wrong thing?
No.
It is still the wrong thing, even when it is empty.
The problem that is emerging here is that the "self" the "ego" the thing (we think) that is doing these things is stuck at the level of good and bad.
We think if good and bad are empty then they are the same. But that is only true if we are at eye level with good and bad. If we rise up beyond good and bad, then we can now see them as good and bad, but against a deeper level of emptiness.
So its been put to me like this before. As we deepen our grasp of reality we do not simply remove one coat of ignorance, we remove layers.
When we know that we did something right we are at a layer. Within this layer it is absolutely right. But when we get to the next layer, we can see that behind the "right" is another layer that is neither right or wrong. This does not stop the right/wrong layer being right or wrong! It just enables us to see the rightness and the wrongness as empty.
This is the difference between sunyata and nihilism. It is translated as "emptiness" but its also "fullness." Right is full of rightness, and this fullness is from the next layer of the onion itself empty.
This is a complex way of saying that when the ego attaches to a layer, it has no where to do. When the ego is stuck in the right/wrong layer then like a pin ball its bouncing around between right and wrong decisions.
I mean our lives are like this. We have so many decisions to make and they can all be right or wrong. Some with bigger outcomes than other to be sure. But the problem is that when "we" are inside the ball being bounced around its a very full existence indeed. And it means we are constantly slipping into right and wrong things.
Again this is life. But "we" don't need to be going through the pin ball. It can be happening all by itself. we can eb making our decisions quite happily, without feeling we're on a toboggan run.
In real disaster situation where we need make instant and critical decisions its amazing how it all "just happens." Only afterwards looking back do we have time to "put ourselves in the picture." "Wow did I really do that?" we think. I never knew I had it in me. Of course that can go both ways. Sometimes we look back and think, wow I was a bastard how could I have been so mean. But this denarrativising that occurs after the event, is clearly very different from what happened at the time. And when its a panic situation when we don't have time to put ourselves in the picture is when its most obvious we are not really there anyway. It happens by itself.
Oh that's a worrying feeling for the ego. You're not so important mate. I don't need you! Ouch. Quickly lets renarrativise to make ourselves important. Perhaps a bit of self destruction, like, "well you are a bad person, see you were there when you did this etc". Ah ha, not so unimportant now am I. I can even destroy myself.
So Ego insists on being present and Good/Bad is a great place for it to invite itself in.
But once embedded at this layer of the onion, we can't think without it. Ok you say "good is empty" well that means "I" can just ignore good then, and do whatever "I" want. Ego was sitting quite happily inside "Good", "I am a good person" but when you beat the hornet's nest and turf it out into the open it starts running towards something else like bad. If Good and Bad are empty then why not go and live in Bad. Can do whatever "I" want.
Stupid ego. You know what is good and bad before you even start complaining. And, no amount of running around, or grasping at "emptiness" changes that. The running around is all empty too. Just STOP.
So we know what good is and we know what bad is. We know when we make a good decision, and we know when we make a bad one. Okay ego may try and deny we made a mistake, and may throw up a justifying smoke screen to confuse the matter and try and come out good. We wouldn't be arguing in our own favour if we didn't already know we messed up. Just STOP.
So we know what good is and we know what bad is. Once we STOP and accept that then we are ready for the next layer of the onion. From there we can see the goodness and the badness as not belonging to us but just the decision. Oh I did good today, I got that right: nice feeling, proud, people happy, things good. But none of that needs to belong to anyone. Its good enough just as it is.
More difficult oops I did bad today, I got that wrong: bad feeling, ashamed, people unhappy, things bad. But none of that needs to belong to anyone. That will probably automatically encourage improvement, but right now its good enough just as it is.
This is the next layer of onion. This is how good and bad are empty.
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