How to Help

This is a seemingly dangerous position, but I am more convinced that it works.

Faced with violence or any wrong doing we should adopt Jesus' approach and suffer that wrong doing in silence, neither seeking to defend ourselves, nor seeking to retaliate against the wrong doer.

This is especially possible if we do not take sides. Normally in a conflict we are encouraged to take sides and to fight on one side against the other. That is the sporting logic that is so prevalent.

This is particularly potent when we are one of those sides ourselves. It is inconvievable to most people that someone might not automatically take sides with themselves. The very fact that we have a choice whether to take sides, or not take sides, with other people is a clue to the freedom that we can exert. That freedom is fundamental and we are quite at liberty, and quite reasonable, in exercising that liberty regarding ourselves also.

If I am angry or unhappy I would not take sides with myself, why would we take sides with such a person anyway? Let that anger or unhappiness pass away un-noticed, certainly don't get involved with it. Likewise if we experience the wrong doing of other people, simply do not take sides neither with yourself nor against the perpetrators. Stay out of it like Jesus did. If we can rise above such temptation to take up the tools of wrong-doing ourself to defend ourself and attack others then we have risen above the level of mortal existence and that is called surviving death.

It follows then that with other people we do not take sides either. Faced with people who do wrong we should not take sides against them, and we should not take sides with them (obviously what they have done is wrong and we don't associate with that). But we do give them an open space to be themselves, to be listened to, to be loved and respected - we give them the right to be themselves. Thoughts of defending victims, or protecting perpetrators - all such 'taking sides' approaches are irrelevant.

Through that process they can then start to be themselves. The goal is for themselves to look at what they have done and disown it, saying "I will never do that again, that is no longer a part of myself". By realising that they are different from wrong doing they have learned not to take sides with wrong doing and against what is good.

What is unusual is that the same must be done for those who are "too good". Being good is a stepping stone away from being bad. We take sides with good as an antedote to taking sides with bad. But, we need to at some stage see that good-doing does not belong to us either. This is a very profound step to be approached at the right time.

If we take the side of good then we are commiting ourself to the success of good. If the world were to turn bad then we would have lost. Yet the true God is all pervading in all worlds at all times and all places for all people. If our existence rests upon the prevaling of good against evil then we are worshipping a false god.

It is not about football teams, of good against evil. It is about peace and universal salvation. When we learn to no longer take sides then can abide in all worlds and watch all football games, and accept all outcomes with an equal mind.

The nagging worry that without awareness of good and evil we may do evil is an evil doubt! because when we don't take sides how could we ever perpetrate evil "against" anything. In the football world we would not do evil to ourself only maybe to another person. In the not-taking-sides-world there is no other side, nor a home side, so how can there be evil at all?

Not taking sides with people, offering "them" complete solidarity without accepting or rejecting what they have done, so that they might be able to accept what they have done, weigh it up, and see that it is not really them I think is helping.