Betty Blue and the beginning

Yesterday did some more archaeology to find out how i got to this position.

It all began in March 1994. I read Karl Jungs "Man and his Symbols" in the local library. Later that week i saw Betty Blue on TV and it left this lasting impression that haunted me for about 2 weeks or more afterwards.

The film is so beautiful, the colours, and especially Betty herself she is enigmatic and it got me thinking. In the film she kick starts Zorg's writing career by awakening the novel that he has stored under his bed. The film of course was a book originally. So what book is this that we enigmatically never find out? Well of course it is the book Betty Blue about the process of awakening that is portrayed by the wild force of nature Betty. It is a film about itself and at the end after she has died and been absorbed into the story itself (which carriers her name) he is left sitting at a desk and is asked, are you writing? And he replies, no I am thinking. And from that we realise that he has told the story all the way upto the moment in which he is then portrayed. The film arrives at a moment of incredibly profound self reflection as it tries to portray even more profoundly than with the icon of Betty the processes that have given arise to it. At that moment Betty is a real entity alive within the world - the creative process itself. For Betty read Anima figure from Karl Jung.

And so my project began, and I have forgotten how it began, to awaken that force within myself. To find my own Betty. And I suppose I did but for me Betty was truer to her character in my film for she was only that - the awakening of a literary and spiritual force within myself - and now I realise that maybe the biological and the real was as important for now it has gone, unlike Zorg I am not left with the awoken spiritual force as much as the loss of what was real. My muse always said she was the Realist and i always knew i was the Idealist i think i should have listened to her more.